travel

I was in my car for a good 9 hours yesterday as I drove down the California coast in the middle of a major storm. Driving in the rain, hydroplaning and almost getting rear-ended by a giant truck puts a lot of things in perspective.

First of all, why in the frickin hell did I agree to do this show? Why did I agree to leave my home for five weeks? What am I trying to prove?

I must say that the play I am working on is lovely - everyone is lovely.

I am just 500 miles from home. I have to uproot my child for three weeks and bring her here with me. The husband has to be overly stressed becuase he has to single dad it for two weeks (one on either end of the five).

So the question is: is all this worth it? Is the traveling, free-lancing thing going to be what I do or do I just need to make sure I only work locally? Do I need to change my vocation? Next year when the kid is in kindergarten it is going to be harder to just pull her out to come with me to do a gig. I miss her terribly and I have only been gone for 32 hours.

The last time I did this it was easier. I was paid more so I was able to hire a Nanny the whole time. Perhaps I just need to set my price tag a bit higher so that I can afford to have some of the things I need and not rely (really impose) on the kindness of family and friends to help me thru it.

I should just break even doing this show. So financially it is not really worth it. But, the question is - did I say "yes" becuase I am terrified of not getting asked again? Or did I say "yes" becuase I really want to do the show (which is lovely but does not alter the way theatre is done.) or becuase I am just a masochist.

On the bright side, I am back in my old haunts and will get to see a lot of friends. But, isn't that what vacations are for?